Serenity Now!
Why do you run? Some people run to keep in shape. Running really gives you the most “bang for your buck”- you can walk out your front door and get in a great workout in 45 minutes. You can’t say that about many other activities. People run because they love to be outdoors. Or they have a group of friends to run with and they love the community. Or they love the competitive aspect. Or they love the time alone, or they love the endorphins… so many reasons to run. Since my foot is messed up, I got in the pool (again) for (yet another) pool run this morning. I know! I’m so lucky to have a pool! Right in my own backyard! What a great alternative when you can’t run! But as I ran around and around in little circles, it suddenly seemed…. so frickin’ pointless. All I Really Need To Know, I Learned From my Stress Fracture Years ago, in my twenties when I was running fifty miles a week (ah, the good old days!) I got a stress fracture in my shin. I threw myself onto the machines at the gym, primarily the bike, thinking I would get my cardio fix and stay in shape that way. Interestingly, the stresses of life piled on so high that finally one day I felt like I was about to explode. And that’s when I realized what running gives me. The act of moving my body, while moving forward in space, is symbolic of moving forward in life. When I’m on the stationary bike, or the elliptical, or the stairclimber, I’m moving my body but GOING NOWHERE. There’s a reason “spinning your wheels” is a bad thing. Likewise, “going around and around in circles” is unsatisfying. I believe when we’re moving our body but not moving forward, our subconscious mind is aware of that. We may feel like things are fine for a while, but suddenly one day we realize life is unsatisfying and monotonous. Likewise, when we’re running outside on a regular basis, our subconscious understands that life is an amazing adventure that we’re moving through joyfully. So… what to do? Well, let’s see. I can’t run, or walk briskly without discomfort. I don’t like the bike- I know, you’re thinking “Guess what, Jenny? If you RIDE YOUR BIKE OUTSIDE, you’re moving forward, duh!” I agree there’s some truth there, but for me, there’s still a machine between me and the ground, doing some of the work. The closest thing I’ve found to getting that same satisfaction is swimming… and I’m considering it. It would require joining a gym with a pool, because our pool isn’t big enough for lap swimming. Whether or not I’ll take that leap is dependent on the results of my MRI. But for now… I’m focusing on yoga. I took a power yoga class regularly years ago and loved it. Now I do yoga on the Peloton app, and I’m loving it again. I don’t have enough experience with it yet to have any big, profound theories about why I love it, but for now I can say, it does not feel pointless. It’s something satisfying that will (hopefully) keep me sane until I can run again. How about you- do you feel like running has a deeper meaning in your life? Does anything else give you that same feeling?