Limitations From Both Sides Now
A couple days ago, Elisabeth published a post called I Won’t Play On The Men’s Olympic Hockey Team (On Limitations). I loved it so much and started to leave a comment… but then realized I had a LOT to say, so I’ve stolen the topic for my own post. (Thanks, Elisabeth!) I remember years ago, having a very passionate argument with my (now ex) boyfriend on the subject of limitations. He truly believed that you can do anything if you truly want it and work hard enough. I disagreed, citing the example that I couldn’t be an Olympic gymnast or a professional basketball player, no matter how hard I tried. But he refused to back down from his position. I’m surprised we didn’t break up then and there, because that way of thinking drives me nuts. Sure, I agree that most people limit themselves too much, and there’s a lot to be said for pushing yourself beyond perceived barriers. HOWEVER. I still stand by the belief that even if I had decided at the age of three or four, worked harder than anyone else and believed with all my heart, there was still no way I was going to become a professional ballet dancer. There are just some things that require an amount of innate talent to be successful. There’s a saying, “Hard work beats talent that doesn’t work hard.” We’ve always said it to our kids about their musical endeavors. Probably the most common words out of my mouth are “just keep practicing.” But the truth is, both my kids were born with musical talent. Without it, you can only go so far. Likewise, without hard work, you’ll only go so far. It’s the combination of the two things that make a successful musician. Okay, so most of us aren’t trying to be a ballerina, gymnast, or professional musician. Most of the things we want can be obtained with persistence and the belief that we can do it. Getting a degree, running a marathon, having a successful and challenging career, putting our kids through college- these are all areas where we should aim high and not let limiting beliefs stop us. But… What about a different kind of limitation? When I was visiting my sister recently, she warned me that their front porch got very slippery when it rained. I said something like “Oh, I’m always very careful when I see a wet surface like that” and we had a little conversation about how in our youth, we would never think twice about slipping on the porch, but now that we’re older, one of our goals in life is “don’t fall.” A little caution never hurt anyone. On the last day of that visit, I went for a hilly run (very hilly for a this flat Florida runner) and hurt my hamstring. I made some sort of snarky comment to my sister about hurting my leg on “her” hills, and she said “Didn’t we have a conversation about being careful? You didn’t really follow your own advice.” Hrumph. In a week I’ll be in Waco, Texas helping my son move into his apartment. I’m hoping to do some running while I’m there, and have been researching parks with running trails. One recommended hike is “Jacob’s Ladder,” 100 steps built into a hillside, with incredible views at the top. Ooh, I can’t wait! And then I had the unwelcome thought, “I hope it doesn’t hurt my hamstring.” Wait! I don’t want to think like that! I don’t want to be that person, who has to avoid fun adventures for fear of hurting myself. I had an older man come in for a massage the other day- he has back issues, which are exacerbated when he plays golf. He still plays, but explained that he just doesn’t take a full swing anymore. Granted, he’s probably in his 80s, so it’s great that he’s still playing golf at all. But I’m only 56, and I guess what I’m saying is, I still want to take a full swing. I’m trying to figure out how to balance that desire with the desire to avoid injuring myself. I’ll admit it’s a mindset shift that I’m having trouble with. It’s funny that in my youth I argued that limitations exist, and now I’m chafing against them. I’ll probably walk up Jacob’s Ladder in Waco, but there’s a part of me that wants to believe that no, I’m going to run up those 100 steps. I’m not ruling it out. Thanks as always to Kim and Zenaida’s Tuesday Topic linkup! Do you believe that limitations exist, or that we can do literally anything? Do you accept that you’ll have more limitations as you get older? Or are you fighting against that like me?