Real Talk Runfessions
Am I speaking for everyone when I say January just flew by? HOW is it the last Friday of the month??? But here we are, and of course I’m joining Marcia in the Runfessional. Last week, Renee published her post “All Aboard the Struggle Bus.” Her honestly really touched me. She said “I really wonder how some people are able to run, work out, go to their job, take care of family/home, blog and have a lot of engagement on social media… I often wonder what is wrong with me? why can’t I just manage it?” Well, Renee, let me tell you what’s really going on over here. I know it’s tempting to always put our best foot forward. Even in a post where I’m being “honest” about my struggles, I’ll still choose the most flattering photo to include, and leave out certain details. So here’s real talk about how I “manage it.” I’ve been doing a pretty good job of finding time to run, work out, take care of my daughter, and go to work. Wait! What was that other thing Renee mentioned? Oh… the house. Well, I can runfess that my house has gone to wrack and ruin. I bragged about getting my Christmas tree down on December 31st, but NEVER FINISHED PUTTING EVERYTHING AWAY. Because I haven’t finished packing them up properly, the Christmas bins are all sitting in front of my closet, so I can’t even get to my clothes and have taken to draping my clean clothes on top on my dresser, where I can at least reach them. I cleaned up the biggest messes from my daughter’s birthday party but never finished because we had our trip to Tampa. There’s still remnants from that event out on the patio- a trampled “Happy Birthday” sign, an extra table with a vinyl tablecloth, and even some empty water bottles. Every time I think I’ll have a big chunk of time to clean everything up, I get bogged down with all the new messes. I feel like I’ve been doing laundry continually since our trip, and of course I never get a break from the meal prep and cleanup. So… I’m definitely not managing that part of my life very well. Some people would refuse to live like this, but I’ve been prioritizing going to the gym and long trail runs over cleaning the house. Let’s move on! Renee also talks about starting over. “How do we remove the memories from our brain? How do we just forget about the times when running wasn’t a struggle? When 5K was the minimum you would run 3 – 6 times a week and then 10K became the new 5K? How do you go from running “fast enough” to belong in a running club to what some people do as a fast walk? It’s hard. I’m sad. ” It IS hard. Over the summer I ran a 5K at the same pace I ran a half marathon three years ago. And when I was 30 I ran a full marathon at that pace. I know… that was a long time ago. But still- my old marathon pace is now my 5K pace? That’s a big slowdown. Next month I’m running a half marathon, the same one I ran three years ago. I’ll be running much slower this time, and I’m trying to accept that. Or maybe I shouldn’t just accept it- maybe I should be doing speedwork. But every time I do speedwork I get injured and end up even slower than before. I’m trying to figure out if there’s a solution, or if I just need to embrace being a slower runner. Even writing that sentence doesn’t feel good though. Let’s talk about walking. I’m still doing Galloway’s Run-Walk-Run method of 4 minute running/30 second walking intervals. I thought I would just do it in the summer when it was so hot, but I’ve continued it because it seems like it’s helping me avoid injuries. And, I’m planning to do a trail 50K in April where walking will be a necessity. So it’s all good! Except… The other day I was out for a 4 mile run. My watch beeped for my 30 second walk interval, so I obediently slowed to a walk. Just then a man (walking) passed me going the other direction and he smiled sympathetically and said “It’s hard to run the whole time, isn’t it?” What??? NO! I COULD run the whole time, I just choose not to! I mean… I’m training for an ultra! I used to never walk! I’ve run marathons without walking! I… Of course I said none of this, because that guy doesn’t really care. It doesn’t matter. But I’ll runfess… his comment hurt. So that’s what’s going on, for real, around here. Anyone else have struggles to share? Are you happy with where your fitness is at? Is your house clean???