Endings
How is it the end of November??? There’s only one more day, and that will be my Weekly Rundown post- NaBloPoMo is almost over. NOOOO! I’m just getting started, ha ha. Seriously- there were a few days where I was busy and had a little stress over getting a post published. But for the most part I’ve absolutely loved it (as I always do). There are still so many blog posts I haven’t commented on… and I still have things to say! Well, good thing we’ll all still be blogging in December, but I’ll miss the daily fun. Speaking of missing things… I’m sad that Thanksgiving is over! I love the holiday; I love the buildup to it, all the shopping, cooking, and festivities. Now we’re fully into Christmas (put away your pumpkin- get out the gingerbread!) and while Christmas is my favorite holiday, I’m sad that Halloween and Thanksgiving are over for another year. This Thanksgiving was especially poignant for me. Next year, my son probably won’t come home for Thanksgiving. He was only able to this year because of an anomaly in the Northwestern academic calendar. He also has a serious girlfriend, and if things progress, he’ll eventually be dividing holidays between two different families. I was aware that this is probably the last time our Thanksgiving will look like this, with just the four of us at home. As we started dinner, I raised my glass to make a toast but couldn’t get the words out because I was overcome with emotion. I know it’s all good- we want our kids to grow up and have lives of their own- but I hate endings. Recently, a colleague of ten years was leaving for a different job, and I was relieved that on her last day, I was in with a client when she left so I didn’t have to say goodbye (I did text her afterwards and we still keep in touch). If I’m at a party, I would rather sneak away rather than say goodbye to the host (of course touching base later; “Thanks so much, I had a great time! Sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye.” I know this makes me sound like a terrible person (although I believe this is called an “Irish goodbye” so I’m not the only one who does it!) It’s not that I don’t want people to know what they mean to me, or that I won’t miss them- I just hate the actual moment of saying goodbye, the official ending. Does anyone else feel like this? Do you hate endings? Are you good at saying goodbye? Are you angrily crossing me off your party guest list right now? Top photo by david Griffiths on Unsplash