Recently I read two books that I can’t stop thinking about. To me, that’s the mark of a great book. Both these books were engrossing and well-written, but they also made me think, not just about the story, but about my own perspectives and limitations. The first one is The Help by Kathryn Stockett.
It was published in 2009 so I’m a little late to this party. The quote on the cover reads:
‘This could be one of the most important pieces of fiction since To Kill a Mockingbird… If you only read one book… let this be it.”-NPR.org
Well! That sounds pretty important. I knew from the back cover that it’s about racial tension in the 1960s in Jackson, Mississippi. I wasn’t sure it was going to tell me anything I didn’t already know, but my sister assured me that it’s a compelling story, so I decided to read it.
Well, this book was so good. It’s not a thriller, but it’s still a page-turner. There were many times where I just couldn’t put it down because I wanted to know what happened next. Although it’s fiction, the author grew up in Jackson and talks about her own experience in an epilogue entitled “Too Little, Too Late.”
The thing that shocked me about this book was that these events took place in the 1960s. I was BORN in the 1960s. Not that I remember much (I was born in 1966) but I definitely remember the 1970s, and I’m sure things weren’t a whole lot better then. But I grew up in a wealthy, mostly white suburb of Chicago where the people were educated and progressive- and, to my eyes, racism didn’t exist.
There were a few Black kids, but to single them out because of their skin color would have been just as ridiculous as discriminating against a kid with curly hair. You just didn’t do it- it would never have occurred to us.
In retrospect, I think the adults around us were trying to raise us to be as “color blind” as possible. Maybe that was their solution to the racism in our country. I’m not sure it was the best approach (maybe a little more education on the subject would have been helpful) but I’m grateful for the attempt. Never before have I truly appreciated the privileges I enjoyed growing up.
I remember writing an essay in seventh grade- I can’t remember the subject but somehow racism was involved. I wrote something like “In those days, people were racist.” On the day he passed our essays back, the teacher stood in front of the class, totally exasperated, and said “I’ve got news for you kids- racism STILL EXISTS.” It was the first time anyone ever told me that.
Obviously, I’ve broadened my horizons since then, but the fact that I just read The Help and put two and two together- this was going on at the same time I was growing up in Highland Park, Illinois, completely oblivious- shows me how little I really understand racism in this country.
The second book is The Prettiest Star by Carter Sickels. In 1986, 24-year-old Brian returns from New York City to the small town in Ohio where he grew up- infected with AIDS. Not only is he grappling with the death of his lover and many friends and his own mortality, but the ignorance of the people in his town who shun him (including most of his own relatives.)
It’s a sad, sad, sad book. Once again it’s fiction, but in the acknowledgments the author cites books, articles and documentaries he used in his research to write the story. And once again… I had to confront my own self-absorption and lack of empathy on this subject.
I was in high school and college in the 1980s. Of course I knew about AIDS. I wasn’t living in a small town full of ignorant people! I knew that people (mostly gay men) got it from unprotected sex, or sharing needles, or blood transfusions. I knew that it was wrong and mean to say that AIDS was God’s punishment of the gay community. I didn’t personally know any gay people (or I should say, no one I knew at the time was openly gay) but I knew AIDS was a terrible thing.
BUT! Reading this book made me think, really think for the first time, about how tragic it was, all these young men dying like that. Back when AIDS was a horrible health crisis (not that it’s not still horrible- but it’s more manageable now) I would have said it was sad- but did I ever, for one single minute, really think about what these people were going through and actually FEEL SAD for them? No.
It’s fascinating to me that just now, at the age of 56, I’m starting to appreciate how enormously diverse our country is. If you grow up on Chicago’s North Shore, you can’t imagine what it’s like to be a gay man in New York City, or a Black person in the deep south, or to grow up in a small rural town in Ohio. Maybe that’s why our country is so divided- of course we’re not all going to see things the same way.
I’m not saying I have any solutions here. But these books are at least helping me to see the problem more clearly.
Thanks once again to Kim and Zenaida’s Tuesday Topic linkup!
Have you read any great books lately?
28 Responses
I haven’t read “The Help” yet. It’s definitely going on my TBR list.
Growing up in Switzerland, the only foreign kids we had in our school were Italian kids. They integrated quickly.
I only learned about racism much later on. Having said that, there was an insidious kind of segregation in my school: kids from poorer backgrounds were ostracized and socially excluded. Probably would make for a good book, too.
Yes, it must be interesting to hear about racism in America from afar. It’s so different from what you describe in Switzerland, because I would assume the Italian families came there voluntarily.
Segregation like that must be universal- there’s always some sort of class system, it seems.
I just finished a book called The Latecomer. It’s a fascinating read about triplets of Jewish parents who try to raise them open-minded and liberal. Once they get out in the real world, things get interesting. There are also a lot of family dynamic issues. It took me a while to read because it’s a big book with a lot to unpack. But it has stuck with me and I can’t stop thinking about it. Yes, that is definitely the sign of a good book!
That does sound interesting! It sounds a little like my own childhood (although I wasn’t Jewish.) My parents were trying to raise us the same way,like we went to a Unitarian church and were very liberal politically. I’m going to look for that book.
Interesting. I’ve steered clear of The Help since all the criticisms came out about it leaning hard into the white savior narrative, but I can see how it might lend a different perspective on race.
I’m happy to hear that The Prettiest Star resonated with you, too. I thought the writing was so perfect for the topic.
I didn’t hear that criticism of The Help. I can see where it’s coming from, but the Black women characters were very strong. The white “savior” also had her trials and tribulations, and it was interesting to see that being a white woman in the south at that time was also problematic (for some.) Overall I think it’s good because it brought the topic to people’s attention. And, the author is a white woman who grew up in Jackson so it makes sense that it’s semi-autobiographical.
Yes, The Prettiest Star was so good and the writing is beautiful. I hope more people read it.
I haven’t read The Help but I have seen the movie. The movie was so good, but of course made me upset about how things were not to long ago.
Yes- it really was fairly recent. That’s what shook me up when I read it.
You might like the book I’m reading now (picked it up at one of the free libraries): Americanah. It’s extremely interesting. It’s easy to say “I’m not racist” but the truth is I do come from privelege, even though as a Jew, even I definitely heard some slurs at school). Most of the places I’ve lived have been very white, although in Austin we lived sort of on the bad side of town and our neighborhood had a fairly large Hispanic population.
I read The Help (a great book!) when it first came out & saw the movie, but haven’t heard of the other one.
Even as a Yoga teacher it’s something I think about, because in the West Yoga is so heavily thin White woman, and I worry about cultural appropriation as well. I have no answers either. A good though provoking book is never a bad thing though!
Yes- answers are hard to come by. But it’s good to shaken out of our complacency sometimes. Interesting what you say about yoga- I can see that.
The help was so good! I remember talking about it w my mom at the time who grew up in Virginia in the 50’s and 60’s and she thought it was spot on. Some things have changed quite a bit others not so much. PS I hope you watch the movie too bc it’s a good one
Yes, I know it’s a movie- I’ll have to watch it. It was probably interesting to talk to your mom about growing up at that time period in Virginia.
The Help is one of my favorite books of all time. It really is thought-provoking and does force one to question one’s upbringing and how that impacts where we are today.
Yes, AND one thing I didn’t mention is that it’s uplifting in the end. Not that it paints an overly rosy picture, but it’s nice to read a book like that and end it feeling good. Great, great book.
I think us northerners can say that we aren’t racist or that racism is less of a problem here. But my view on that has been challenged. My book club read a collection of essays about racism from Minnesota authors, and one essay that stays with me is one where the author talks about picking a grad school program. She talked about how she toured a college in the south where she saw a lot of confederate flags and how that was a total turn off for her. She ended up going to a grad school in Minnesota and encountered a lot of racism. Upon reflection, she felt like she was tricked into thinking that we aren’t racist here in Minnesota because you don’t see confederate flags here. But encountering unexpected racism was harder in a way versus knowing what she was up against in an area where flags were flying… I’m not doing the best job of explaining this, but that essay really stuck with me.
When I am ready for a heavier book, I will need to read “The Prettiest Star.” It sounds really impactful. I’ve read some great fiction the AIDS epidemic. The Great Believers by Rebecca Makkai and Christadora by Tim Murphy both stand out in my mind. I had a sad/frustrating conversation recently about Monkeypox. The people I was talking to were adamant that it only impacted active male homosexuals. I tried to explain that that population is impacted by it but the disease is broader than that, just as HIV was initially more prevalent in that population but it expanded. But I got nowhere with that discussion so gave up. 🙁
Yes, I think there’s hidden racism in the north. It makes me wonder if I have racist tendencies that I’m not even realizing??? That essay sounds really interesting.
You would think we’ve moved well beyond the attitudes of the 80s, but your conversation about monkeypox shows that in a lot of ways, we haven’t.
I really enjoyed two books of essays – I Miss You When I Blink and Bomb Shelter – both by Mary Laura Philpott!
I also just finished re-reading Notes On A Nervous Planet and Four Thousand Weeks. All these books made me think, but weren’t necessarily books where I needed to take action.
I’ve heard of all those books (and am still currently reading Four Thousand Weeks.) Notes in a Nervous Planet has been on my TBR for a while now.
I read the Help and saw the movie. Both were great. I now want to read the other one
Just finished The Tobacco Wives. Any book that makes you think and how tobacco was the livelihood of the south and the fact that it was harmful to one’s health was hidden.
Hmm, that does sound interesting! I’ll have to check it out.
Late to the party but I wanted to chime in. I was just a kid during the height of the AIDS crisis; I was born in 1975 so I was aware of AIDS, and I knew that it affected mainly the gay community, but I didn’t really think about it much, because I was young. I remembered Princess Diana causing a huge sensation by hugging AIDS patients.
As an adult, I am absolutely horrified by the AIDS crisis and the attitudes of people towards patients. I have read a few books talking about it, and the thought that people were dying in a really painful and horrible way, in droves, and were shunned by the community, well. What a dark time. How scary and tragically sad.
Yes, I’m only fully appreciating it now. It’s astonishing how far we’ve come, both in attitude (although not quite far enough there) and treatment options.
Thank you for bringing those books to my attention and your thoughts and self reflection. I am not sure I have ever acknowledged all those things. myself. I will see if I can find. those books in the local library they sure sound worth reading and educating oneself.
Tobia! My old NaBloPoMo friend! I was just thinking about you. Thanks for checking in- I will visit your blog as well. Yes, I would be interested to hear what a non-American thinks of these issues. Great to hear from you!
I haven’t read any of those books (I have seen The Help, the movie, really good!). They definitely look like something I would read. Thanks!
I haven’t seen the movie of The Help. I’m not sure if I want to- the book was so good, the movie might be a disappointment. Although, everyone seems to love it so it’s probably great.
If you want to look into racism and examine your own perceptions a bit more I’d really recommend White Fragility by Robin di Angelo (criticised for being by a White woman but it’s quite useful to see things through her perspective) and Why I’m No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Renni Eddo-Lodge (though UK centric). I also found both of the Good Immigrant books very instructive. All on my blog or you could click my Social Justice – Race tag to find more ( https://librofulltime.wordpress.com/category/social-justice-race/ ). I’m certainly still learning and I’m glad so many books are coming out at the moment that can help us all to learn.
I know White Fragility was really popular for a while there- I’ll check it out, and also the other book you mentioned. Thanks for the recommendations!