This week I listened to this James Altucher podcast with Dr. Benjamin Hardy. It was a fascinating conversation, and one of the things that stuck with me is their description of the “Four C’s”- Commitment, Courage, Capability, and Confidence.
In order to start a new project, we can’t rely on confidence. As a matter of fact, if the project is big enough or new enough, we won’t have confidence at all. The important thing is to commit to it; have the courage to begin; slowly gain capability; which will eventually lead to confidence.
I would actually put courage first, because sometimes it takes courage to even commit to a new venture. Whether it’s signing up for a race, starting a blog, finding a new job, deciding to start a family (eek! Who feels confident about raising kids before they have them?) or any number of adventures, courage is the first requirement.
Albert Einstein said “Imagination is more important the knowledge.” Yes, and courage is more important than confidence.
I still haven’t decided on a race (although I got some great advice in the comments on that post!) As a matter of fact I’ve added another possibility to the mix, Death at Dupuis. It’s a “last person standing” format. “All runners will be running a 4.166667 mile loop to be started at 8:00 am. The race restarts at the top of the hour every hour until only one runner can complete the loop on time, or everyone quits.”
The race is held in a natural area about an hour from me, that I’ve never been to. I checked last year’s results, and the winner ran 133 miles. But there were a lot of people who ran a 50K or shorter- so it would be perfectly fine to show up and do as much as you can. I’m intrigued!
I know that I just have to choose a race and sign up. Once I sign up, all the lingering doubts (“I don’t know if I can run 50 miles! Can I run a 50K all on sand? Will I really be able to get to a race four hours away?”) will fade away. Whichever race I choose will become a reality, and I’ll figure out how to make it work. But right now, I’m still dithering.
Have you ever started a project fueled by courage, before your confidence kicked in?- I think if I waited until I felt confident, I would never start anything at all.
30 Responses
I definitely agree that courage comes before confidence. In fact, sometimes confidence doesn’t come at all but you still have to have the courage to try and then keep trying even when you’re still feeling tired, weak or overwhelmed! I was once told that I was confident about something at work and I told the guy that I was not confident; I was just good at faking it!
Yes, that’s a great point- it’s not a given that confidence will ever come. But, we still have to try things and keep trying. And if all else fails, faking it works pretty well!
I think the hardest thing about something is not knowing what’s coming next, so yes, I think once you sign up for a race it will be much better. Then you can prepare! And just do it!
That said, the “last man standing” race had me open my eyes wide because that doesn’t sound appealing to me at all. In fact, it sounds like recipe for injury!
I had the same thought about the last man standing race, Nicole! I can see a lot of people getting hurt! I’d be interested in why that sounds appealing to you, Jenny!
Hmm, a lot of people seem to think that race doesn’t sound very fun! I’m actually leaning towards doing it at the moment… I’ll write more about it in another blog post.
Well, you could look at it either way- in this type of race you could drop out at any time (or, once every four miles) if something didn’t feel right. As opposed to being out in the middle of nowhere and pushing yourself to go on, because you don’t have any other choice.
What a great race format!!!
How does it work – is there a break if you finished the 4 miles before the hour is up? Or is it an ongoing run and you just have to make sure that you finish the 4 miles within that full hour? In any case, I hope that you try this, it sounds intriguing!!
I mindlessly sign up for things and then figure out things later (why do I keep on doing that?). Therefore, I only need courage when I need to start training for the monstrosity I committed myself to.
Ha, so in your case commitment comes before courage! It seems to be working for you.
In this format, you have an hour to complete the loop. If you get done early you use that time for whatever you need (fueling, bathroom break, etc.) but at the hour you have to start the loop again. I also think it sounds really interesting!
Ooooh- I like the frame of doubts fading away as your choice becomes a reality– that’s a good way to describe a phenomenon that applies to so many different situations.
Yes, I think it’s because you can’t really solve problems that are in the abstract. But almost any real, actual problem is solvable.
Yes, courage probably has to come before confidence! I’ll have to dig up a lot of courage when eventually I’ll decide whether I’ll try running again (which won’t happen anytime soon). That race format sounds really cool, and uncommon! I like how it adds another level of challenge.
Yes, I think that format is really interesting. I hope your foot is feeling better!
Exactly… if I waited until I felt confident, I’d never tackle anything hard.
Yes on the first half marathon and yes on my 2nd full marathon.
So far not the trail race. LOL
Well, it might just be that running trails isn’t your thing! You really enjoy road racing, so there’s no reason not to stick with that.
I really love the ultra/trail mentality of “do what you can”. Your race, you get to decide how long it is.
I always used to register as early as possible for races, partly for the discount and also partly because “committing” was very satisfying, but there’s no reason to hurry the decision. Just have fun seeing what races are out there!
That’s funny because over the past several years I’ve had so many injuries, I got in the habit of waiting till the last minute to register for races. Now I’m suddenly stressing because I haven’t picked a race for next winter? You’re right, there’s no reason to hurry.
I would be a HARD PASS on the last man standing! I need a defined distance I’m aiming for otherwise I could potentially talk myself into doing less than 50k, especially when it’s a loop format! But dang there are some interesting race constructs out there!
I definitely need courage comes before confidence. It takes guts to do something that you’ve never done before. And like Kyria said, confidence might never come and you may perpetually feel like you are faking it until you make it! I have struggled with confidence quite a bit in my career… like who am I to be advising people on things like how to invest money? Or I’ll compare myself to where my retired colleague/mentor was at my age and think – but he knew so much more/was more respected. But that’s just me getting inside my head.
Yes, I still struggle with confidence in my career, which is crazy because I’ve been doing it for long enough now! You’re right- we get inside our own heads and have all sorts of negative, unhelpful thoughts.
I think I’d either tap out immediately, or go to the extreme of pushing myself too hard, but that does sound like a REALLY interesting type of race to do at least once as a sort of “check” mark in terms of variety!! (Though you’d be sick of that loop, I bet!).
I definitely felt a lot more confident about raising kids *before* I had them. Yikes. Motherhood has surprised me a lot; I’m not sure why, but I just imagined it would all come so naturally to me. The nurturing, responding to the constant demands of tiny humans, but it really leveled me emotionally and physically (I needed an emergency C-section, couldn’t breastfeed either kiddo, we lived in a tiny apartment). That said, I’m glad I entered motherhood with that optimism and while I wouldn’t call our current phase “easier” it’s very different and feels more manageable. Though I definitely struggle with confidence issues in parenting – there is just so much at stake!!!
Well, you were ahead of me! I felt completely clueless before I had my kids. But we agree on one thing- it’s surprising how hard it is! Sometimes I still feel like I’m just muddling through. I think toddler years are hard, then it gets a little easier, and then teenage years are hard again.
I never thought about it before. It makes sense that courage should come first before commitment. It is that confidence part I sometimes struggle with. I am excited to hear which race you pick!
Yes, I definitely struggle with confidence as well! i liked this idea because if I’m struggling with confidence I can think “That’s okay, I don’t really need it yet.”
Courage is the key but it’s also important to know our limits. The fact that the race, even if tough, is not far from your home could be the deciding factor to participate.
I have been running since 1985 and I entered only one time a “crazy” race far from home but I was member of the Navy Running Team and I couldn’t say “no”.
Yes, I’m definitely leaning towards closer to home!
Definitely – courage before anything else. I feel like we’re courageous every single day to get up and do what we do… some things we’re committed to, some things we’re capable of, and often we feel confident, but it all starts with courage!
Well put, San!
The concept of the 4C’s is very interesting to me. As someone that deals with imposter syndrome, I often find myself lacking confidence even though I know that I work really hard and have been told that as well. I always start out a new project with a strong commitment to the tasks and making sure that we hit deadlines. I think that the confidence part will come later.
I am going to check out this podcast – thanks for sharing!
Yes, I also struggle with imposter syndrome. I think so many people do- which is kind of crazy. We’re all walking around feeling like imposters- it makes no sense!
Wonderful point, Jenny. I completely agree that courage comes first. If you don’t have the courage to leap… how can you accomplish any of the other “steps”? And it’s true in all aspects of life – relationships, job decisions, choosing to start/take on/stop a project, choosing a race… :> Thank you for this, though. It’s a very helpful reframing, in some ways. I tend to forget that *it takes time*, and taking the leap is just the FIRST step.
I’m glad this helped! Yes, it’s true in all aspects of life. It’s easy to forget though, and waste time waiting to do something until we feel confident- that day may never come unless we jump right in.