I just wanted to check in and mention that, in spite of the fact that I’m writing cheery posts about holiday cups and cats, I AM still upset about the election. It’s hard to strike a balance. On the one hand, I don’t want to rant and rave every single day about how much this sucks. No one wants to read that! On the other hand- it feels kind of weird to keep things lighthearted all the time.
Stephany and San have recent posts about their feelings on the subject. For what it’s worth, here’s where I’m at:
I literally haven’t watched or read ANY NEWS AT ALL since I woke up on November 6th and looked at the results. After the initial blow, I stopped caring. I mean, I care what happens to our country. But in the short term, I don’t care about any more news. Voldemort appointed WHO to WHAT? Eh. That’s exactly what I expected.
In the short term, I’ve lost all hope. It’s all bad and only going to get worse. Even in the best case scenario where we vote again in four years, a lot of really bad things are going to happen in the meantime. I’ve accepted that.
In the long term, I do have hope. That’s just something that’s hardwired into my psyche- I always veer toward optimism. I think things might have to hit rock bottom before they get better, but they WILL get better. My son sent me this video, “It’s not over until 2030.” We could be in the middle of a cycle, or the final “turning” before hitting the next high.
I could be wrong, of course. We could have a nuclear holocaust. OR, maybe the Republicans are right! Maybe the economy will be SO GREAT that we’ll stop caring about immigrants, women’s rights, or the environment. Money makes the world go around… apparently.
I’m not saying I’m going to bury my head in the sand until 2030, happily going to football games and buying peppermint soap. There will be a time again for action. I’m just not ready yet.
In the meantime, here are some of my coping strategies:
I’ve started swearing more. The other day, we were watching football and the opposing team scored a touchdown on a close play. I exclaimed, “GODDAMMIT!”
My husband looked at me in astonishment. “I thought you didn’t swear!” Yes, well, I’ve decided to start. Did you know that research shows swearing can actually boost your mood in stressful situations? I have to admit… it feels pretty good.
I’ve started drinking more. I don’t mean drinking to excess, but I was having less than one drink a week. I’m going to up that to at least one drink a week.
I’m only listening to lighthearted podcasts. Like this one:
I’m also listening to The Girl Next Door. The last couple episodes have dealt with heavier issues, but I still listened. I’m also listening to old episodes, like this one about holiday gift giving strategies. When Kelsey explains that she gives her garbage collectors a gift card and small edible gift from Trader Joe’s, Erica says “But how do you give it to them? Can I just leave it on top of my trash can?” Kelsey replies “The fact that you’re asking that question is concerning.” Ah, I love them.
How are you coping these days? Please share!
Top photo by Tracey Hocking on Unsplash
40 Responses
That beer looks good! I tried an NA IPA the other day (along with a flight of IPAs with alcohol) and it was dang good. All of them were. Fremont Brewery in Seattle.
Hey if you have to get it out, this is the place!
Really? I want to find a NA IPA that I like. The ones I’ve tried so far just taste like sadness and disappointment. I’ll have to look around.
Coping. That’s about it. Waiting. Hoping. Grateful to live in one of the arguably safest places to be in the country and yet hoping that’s good enough. Having people in my circle of friends and loved ones who have a lot to lose if some of the people cheering on their vision of what they think will make things greater mean destroying the lives of other people. Knowing that ultimately there’s really not a lot more I can do than live according to my own principles even if some others have lost theirs.
Yes, that sums it up beautifully. Thank you Steve!
I feeeeeel you. I have been reading some news but it makes me mad pretty quickly and I tune out. I moved the NYTs to a different folder in my phone so I can’t open it out of habit. It’s helped to have so many blog posts to read instead of shitty articles about politics! The only ones I do like to read are the VERY FEW about how much it sucks to be a woman right now and how incredibly depressing it is to see Trump win against two women and to see women’s rights be slashed and to see misogyny celebrated by the highest office in the land. That is what really gets to me. I feel like my only hope is this absolute thrashing will FINALLY make the Democrats really understand that they have to do something DRASTICALLY different. I don’t actually believe it will, but I try to have hope that it might. But yeah, thinking about it puts me in a serious funk, so I try not to.
I like the people who voted for Voldemort but have all sorts of justifications for it. And I’m talking about women! What in the world has gone wrong in our country?
I’m also avoiding the news as much as possible, though it’s hard because my work computer pops up little news headlines all throughout the day and I just have to ignore them!
Swearing helps, and I already do it a fair amount, but definitely more since the election. Fortunately I’m around likeminded people who don’t mind a well-placed swear word here or there!
Yes, even with avoiding the news, little snippets seem to creep in. Oh well. There’s always swearing.
I love the Girl Next Door! I also only listen to light or uplifting podcasts. So much in the world is so dark and dreary, I don’t need to listen to that while I’m folding laundry.
Light and uplifting podcasts are definitely the way to go, especially right now!
I thought the Girl Next Door episode announcing Erica’s cancer was handled so perfectly. I don’t know how they manage to be so funny, authentic, and insightful. That is a magic podcast <3
For me, coping with challenging situations in the last few years has involved therapy. A LOT of therapy…
Yes, there are probably a lot more people in therapy now! It’s a good thing. And… I agree. I was so sad to see that episode title, but they handled it really well and it wasn’t a downer (not that I insist they always be upbeat, but you know what I mean.)
I also love GND podcast, but was so saddened by Erica’s news – but relieved that her prognosis is so good. That reminds me that I need to schedule my mammogram for December…
I have to follow the news for my job and talk about the post-election world since it really impacts financial markets. Part of me wants to sit back with a smirk and watch the sh*t show unfold and be like – well, this is what you voted for. But a bigger part of me understands that that is not a healthy way to view things. But I mostly tell myself that it’s all going to be ok, because I can’t handle thinking about the alternative.
I know, I feel the same way sometimes. People in our state- Republicans- are upset that our abortion amendment didn’t pass. Part of me is so, so satisfied by this- well, this is what you voted for, idiots. But then I know that’s not a very mature attitude (it feels good though, heh heh.)
I also need to schedule a mammogram for December!
I am definitely still in “I can barely think about it” mode, but unfortunately, at work, we’re starting to get short articles to edit on “the impact of [this or that bullshit appointment] on the medical devices market” and the like. It’s so awful not to be able to get away.
Uuuuugh. At least I don’t have to deal with this for my job! That would be hard.
Coping and hoping. Hoping that it’s not as bad as it seems. But those Cabinet picks… hard to ignore. My hubby is a news junkie. I am trying to focus on other things.
Coping and hoping… I like that!
I hope your husband can make it through without losing his mind.
I love the girls next door. Yeah, the latest episodes were heavy with Erica’s diagnosis, but they still have so much grace. I have been coping by taking myself off all news outlets. Cocooning myself in works of fiction and blog posts. That beer and kitty photo is adorable!
Yep, your approach sounds pretty much like mine!
I feel very much like you. I was a religious news reader since the pandemic but have only been skimming since the election results. It still feels like a bad dream. I realized that I only have like minded friends and colleagues what makes it easier but it’s also harder because everyone is still angry and sad. I am still unsure how to handle it in the long run. For now it’s one day at a time. The new government is going to happen and there is nothing to be done about it right now. I wish I would feel better when I drink alcohol – I like it but I just don’t sleep well after. Swearing is an option – maybe we should all learn some swear words in other languages. Wouldn’t that be fun?
Ha ha yes!!! You can get us started with some good German swear words.
I approve of Potty Mouthed Jenny! And One-Drink-a-Week Jenny! I don’t swear on the blog because – actually I’m not sure why but it was a choice that I made a long time ago that I’ve stuck with. And I adore my Friday & Saturday night adult beverages. I’m super into hazy IPAs right now.
I am not a fan of Trump or the Republican party, and I most definitely have some concerns about current events, but I also refuse to let these people make me unhappy or to change the way that I feel about my country. Hey, I’ve spent many years living through their administrations. I stopped following the news a long time ago because I felt that I wasn’t getting useful information and it was bumming me out.
Yes, I have to admit I’m not a big news follower even in the best of times. I never feel like I’m getting the truth. Going forward- when I’m ready to hear some news again- I’ll have to find some trusted sources.
I feel like I’m in such a privileged position to just ignore the news, but that’s what I’m doing. I know his cabinet picks are going to be atrocious. I know his first 90 day plan is going to destroy lives. Why should I read about it? I did take heart that some farmers are freaking out about his tariffs and ag policy and I’m all like “what the FUCK did you think was going to happen, FARMERS WHO VOTED FOR HIM?!” and then I’m swearing on other people’s blogs. I’m sorry, Jenny. I’m not mad at you – I’m mad at the American voters who elected that buffoon and are now acting worried about what that means.
I KNOW ENGIE. My favorite are the Republican women’s groups who are upset that our abortion amendment didn’t pass. Hahaha, what did you stupid idiots THINK was going to happen??? Swear all you want!
I’m laughing about the swearing. I’ve tried to cut back, well – sort of had to when the little girls moved in. My biological kids were used to my language. I’ve done a decent job of eliminating it Mostly. It doesn’t surprise me that people who swear in stressful situations end up feeling better, or whatever that study showed. Makes sense to me.
I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed today. Need to renew the GW sticker. Haven’t started my Christmas poem. Emptied my closet, and need to get that sorted and restored to a better system. Fingers crossed. I’m in a not-enough-time-in-the-day mood.
Yes, swearing is not so great when you have little kids around! Luckily my kids are older- and I’ll still try not to swear around them.
Keeping on, that’s what we will do. Together with kindness & compassion, no matter what. Swearing all the way, why the hell not?
Ha ha, okay Hanna. Sounds good to me.
Swearing is literally the best thing ever. Especially after not swearing for awhile! I’ve been doing what I always do — lots of art. The photo of your dog is the cutest!!!
Thank you Tammy! I do have to admit that it’s not my dog though- I got that photo from Unsplash (I did credit it at the bottom of the post, but it probably looked like it was my dog!)
Well still a darned cute dog 😊 thx!
Jenny–I burst out laughing. “GODDAMMIT!” I should wash your mouth out with soap!
J/K I was expecting something really bad!
I too am not paying attention to the news right now… I just can’t. I think we’re all trying to heal a bit before January when we’ll have to be prepared to fight the good fight. I usually listen to the news in the car, but now it’s just the top hits at a volume where I can’t think.
Yes yes yes, to all of this. I feel very hopeless but also energized by everyone else who is also upset and also ready to fight. There’s not much we can do NOW but just hope some Republicans stand up for democracy (LOLZ) and don’t let some of these horrid cabinet picks go through. I’m still paying attention to the news but I have muted a lot of people sharing enraging news stories on Instagram. I need IG to just be about cats and puppies right now.
I am with you! I love that you’ve decided to start swearing because sometimes it really does help. I’d also recommend “On Your Mark, Get Set, Bake” as a good cozy podcast.
I’ll admit to feeling despondent for awhile, and now I’m feeling a little better. Is there any reason for me to feel better? NO. There are reasons for me to feel worse. I just can’t live there, so I’m trying to find hope where I can, even if that means the fact that we’re having chili for dinner.
SWEAR Jenny, and drink if it helps! I know both help me.
Ugh. I am coping. Not well, but as well as I can. If I wasn’t running a gazillion miles right now, I would probably ramp up my mileage… that’s how I cope. I need to run it all out.
I’ve been skimming the news, even listened to Pod Save America (gasp! San listened to a podcast! San doesn’t do podcasts) to get a scoop of what other people are thinking. There are a lot of smart people analyzing the whole situation, but they admit to be as upset as we are.
LOVE that podcast. I have switched to only real news (digital NYT and WSJ and local paper delivered to my driveway. VERY HELPFUL.
Yes, swearing does help with png, It can also reduce pain. That is why when we hurt ourself we need/shoudl swear. I find that so fascinating. What did evolution want us to do here?
I really hope this circus of his is making more fuss and than fizzles aways. that would be great, no?