Well, it was quite a day. I don’r work on Wednesdays, so I had the luxury to alternate between seeking comfort, trying to distract myself, and crying. I’m still trying to make sense of it all, and I’m still extremely sad.
I cried when I saw the election results. I cried when I told my daughter what happened. After I dropped her off at school, I came home, sat on the couch and cried.
Then, I got myself together. I made some tea and oatmeal, and sat on the couch with my cat snuggled nearby, reading blogs. Most people (unlike me) had gone ahead with previously scheduled posts, so there wasn’t much talk of the election results, which was very comforting.
After a while I took a short nap (because I didn’t sleep much the night before, obviously) and then I sprang into action. On the way to school my daughter had a mini-meltdown, saying she doesn’t have anything to wear. Well- I’m not sure that’s our biggest problem right now, but it IS a problem I can do something about. I headed off to the mall.
This was a dangerous excursion, because remember, I live in Florida. It’s not like I’m surrounded by a like-minded community. But I did notice a couple signs I’ve never seen before:
Ah, retail therapy. I browsed! I bought crap I didn’t need! I didn’t even bring my own bags. And then I got a Coke Zero from, of all places, Chick Fil-A. I grappled with that for a moment, but they’re the only place in the food court that has it so finally I thought “Just get the damn drink, Jenny. It doesn’t matter.”
This was a good diversion- I only had one bad moment. In one of the stores, a woman was talking loudly on her phone. She said ‘Well, we got rid of the democrats, so now we can start fixing things.” Um- did you ever stop to think that maybe not everyone voted the same way you did, and we don’t want to hear that? Oh wait- “Trump supporter” and “compassion” don’t go together (oops, sorry. I’m very sorry! I try to go high when they go low, but I don’t always succeed.)
On the way home, I got a text from my son in answer to a message I had sent him earlier:
He’s right. Of course, he doesn’t know what will happen during the next four years; no one does. But there are people who this will affect much more than me. I mean, look at me: “Oh no! Trump won the election! Well, I’m off to the mall to buy soap!” I really am privileged (but I’m still extremely sad.)
One more thing- I’m so grateful for this blogging community. Of course I have like-minded friends, and I have my sister, but I don’t have a local community to turn to. Thank you, blogger friends!
What did you do on Wednesday?
Top photo by Simeon Muller on Unsplash
3 Responses
{{{HUGS}}} It was such a hard day. It was hard to be in front of students but also a good distraction. I’m lucky that no one is outwardly MAGA around these parts so everyone was either outwardly sad or not showing anything. I can’t imagine seeing people celebrating his win.
Honestly, I knew there was a chance he’d win, but I never imagined the giant push rightward across the country. I just don’t know what to think about it. It makes me so upset.
I’m glad you were able to get through the day. I hope tomorrow is better. My goal tomorrow is to not sob. Crying is okay, but I’d like to not sob. Baby steps.
I’m glad you had a day to feel all the feelings. If I lived in Florida, I think I’d walk around wanting to grab every second person by the shoulders and shake some sense into them, although I’d probably just bite my tongue like I do when my brother starts with some right-wing sound bites. What the Trump supporter really meant was, “Well, we got rid of the Democrats, so now we can start breaking more things.”
I dropped the kids at school, went to work, rolled out my yoga mat and had a good cry. The rest of the day pretty much went as usual. Everyone is sad and in shock, my colleagues, my boss, my kids. Deep down I already was fearing this result and started talking to the kids about it throughout the week. I think that helped lesson the blow a little but it might still come. We live in a bubble here and we are also one of the fortunate ones. I am still not sure what to say but I did read some poetry and that helped.