Well, it was quite a day. I don’r work on Wednesdays, so I had the luxury to alternate between seeking comfort, trying to distract myself, and crying. I’m still trying to make sense of it all, and I’m still extremely sad.
I cried when I saw the election results. I cried when I told my daughter what happened. After I dropped her off at school, I came home, sat on the couch and cried.
Then, I got myself together. I made some tea and oatmeal, and sat on the couch with my cat snuggled nearby, reading blogs. Most people (unlike me) had gone ahead with previously scheduled posts, so there wasn’t much talk of the election results, which was very comforting.
After a while I took a short nap (because I didn’t sleep much the night before, obviously) and then I sprang into action. On the way to school my daughter had a mini-meltdown, saying she doesn’t have anything to wear. Well- I’m not sure that’s our biggest problem right now, but it IS a problem I can do something about. I headed off to the mall.
This was a dangerous excursion, because remember, I live in Florida. It’s not like I’m surrounded by a like-minded community. But I did notice a couple signs I’ve never seen before:
Ah, retail therapy. I browsed! I bought crap I didn’t need! I didn’t even bring my own bags. And then I got a Coke Zero from, of all places, Chick Fil-A. I grappled with that for a moment, but they’re the only place in the food court that has it so finally I thought “Just get the damn drink, Jenny. It doesn’t matter.”
This was a good diversion- I only had one bad moment. In one of the stores, a woman was talking loudly on her phone. She said ‘Well, we got rid of the democrats, so now we can start fixing things.” Um- did you ever stop to think that maybe not everyone voted the same way you did, and we don’t want to hear that? Oh wait- “Trump supporter” and “compassion” don’t go together (oops, sorry. I’m very sorry! I try to go high when they go low, but I don’t always succeed.)
On the way home, I got a text from my son in answer to a message I had sent him earlier:
He’s right. Of course, he doesn’t know what will happen during the next four years; no one does. But there are people who this will affect much more than me. I mean, look at me: “Oh no! Trump won the election! Well, I’m off to the mall to buy soap!” I really am privileged (but I’m still extremely sad.)
One more thing- I’m so grateful for this blogging community. Of course I have like-minded friends, and I have my sister, but I don’t have a local community to turn to. Thank you, blogger friends!
What did you do on Wednesday?
Top photo by Simeon Muller on Unsplash
38 Responses
{{{HUGS}}} It was such a hard day. It was hard to be in front of students but also a good distraction. I’m lucky that no one is outwardly MAGA around these parts so everyone was either outwardly sad or not showing anything. I can’t imagine seeing people celebrating his win.
Honestly, I knew there was a chance he’d win, but I never imagined the giant push rightward across the country. I just don’t know what to think about it. It makes me so upset.
I’m glad you were able to get through the day. I hope tomorrow is better. My goal tomorrow is to not sob. Crying is okay, but I’d like to not sob. Baby steps.
Not sobbing is a good goal. I’ll be at work today and my goal is to not cry at all while I’m there.
I’m glad you had a day to feel all the feelings. If I lived in Florida, I think I’d walk around wanting to grab every second person by the shoulders and shake some sense into them, although I’d probably just bite my tongue like I do when my brother starts with some right-wing sound bites. What the Trump supporter really meant was, “Well, we got rid of the Democrats, so now we can start breaking more things.”
It’s hard. I’m envious of people who live in blue states! I’ll probably have some challening moments at work today.
I dropped the kids at school, went to work, rolled out my yoga mat and had a good cry. The rest of the day pretty much went as usual. Everyone is sad and in shock, my colleagues, my boss, my kids. Deep down I already was fearing this result and started talking to the kids about it throughout the week. I think that helped lesson the blow a little but it might still come. We live in a bubble here and we are also one of the fortunate ones. I am still not sure what to say but I did read some poetry and that helped.
I know I have a lot of like-minded co-workers, but not everyone at work is sad today so we can’t talk about it too much. Maybe I need to read some poetry.
Jenny, I have no more words. For all of this..
I am sorry you live surrounded by true supporters and have to deal with them. I am glad this community could proved a little comfort in all that turmoil.
Thank you Tobia! I loved your post today.
When I woke up on Wednesday I completely forgot about the election. I let the dog out, and then got right into running clothes and went out for 2 miles. At some point during the run it clicked that “oh yes there was an election yesterday”. I only checked in with the internets right before my shower and just shrugged. I’m not happy but also what your son said – we get to do this again in 4 years.
I’m glad that you got your Coke Zero! I don’t eat fast food very often, and I eat at CF even less, but when I do, I enjoy it. If I did a deep dive on every company that I send money to, I’m sure that there would be lots of stuff that I’m not OK with, and I just don’t have the time or energy to get into it.
I know, I feel the same way. I’d like to support only companies I believe in but the truth is I would hardly be shopping anywhere.
You might be the only person in the country who woke up on Wednesday FORGETTING THERE WAS AN ELECTION. How did you do that??? You must be a Zen master.
Sage words from a 20-something! I love it. He is right; it’s done now and we can’t really do anything about it but look forward. Or buy soap. Speaking of, I do love a nice handmade soap and my Mom used to get one for us from her local farmer’s market every year and then they went out of business and I miss that soap! We have tried to find a similar replacement but the other ones just are not the same.
Yes my son is wise. I don’t always agree with his perspective, but I keep in mind that he could be right. The younger generation sees things differently and I like that.
I”ll post a photo of my soaps… I love scented holiday soaps!
Yesterday was a very hard day, I’m glad you took the time to do something to distract you! Arizona is a swing state but I live in a most liberal city so I’m mostly surrounded by like-minded people, which is comforting.
I had a work event in the evening so I had to shift my hours around, and didn’t go into the office until noon. So I spent a few hours in the morning “getting lost” in the mountains. I was still consumed with anxious thoughts but getting out in nature helped!
Yes- I was going to take the day off running but ended up going for a run before dinner. It wasn’t exactly in nature, but I was outside moving, and it felt great.
My Wednesday was very busy, but I didn’t get much sleep the night before – 3/3.5 hours maybe – and then I had a terrible headache. I think I wrote yesterday I did think there was a good chance Trump would win, but the popular vote swing in his direction was truly shocking.
Your son is so right about his perspective, though I think some of the outrage people are feeling is because they want to protect those very marginalized groups they know are going to suffer under the coming government.
I did have to chuckle at your daughter: “Well- I’m not sure that’s our biggest problem right now, but it IS a problem I can do something about.” This is LIFE, right? I remember when we had a fairly traumatic fetal diagnosis when I was pregnant with my son. But I had a 3 year old at home so it was a bit surreal to have her melting down over having too much peanut butter on her toast. But, also, I suppose it also helped with perspective?
I fully support emotional buying and eating occasionally. I think we vilify that, but when used properly and in moderation it CAN really help.
Sending hugs from Canada.
Thank you Elisabeth! Yes, I was glad to be reminded that I’m in a privileged situation, but that doesn’t mean I’m not sad for all human beings.
Emotional buying and eating was good, but now I have to go back to return some things because my daughter didn’t like what I got for her (EYE ROLL.) I don’t really need a second day at the mall, sigh.
I had the same thought as your son. I’m lucky that I am a white, cis, heterosexual. And I have privilege beyond that. I’m also lucky to live in a blue state. Phil and I had a long convo about the election after I got home from book club. He is very pragmatic and honestly more forgiving than I am.
I mostly tried not to think about the election yesterday. I ran 6 miles, moved my blog from blogger to WordPress, ordered Christmas cards, got an 85 min massage, and went to book club. It was a pretty full day! But it was nice to have distractions. I barely watched the news and wasn’t on my phone much which was for the best.
Actually it sounds like a pretty nice day! i also had an interesting conversation with my manager at work, who’s gay. He’s not happy about the election results, but also more forgiving than I am. He had some pretty great insights. We’ll vote again in four years.
I just can’t believe people don’t see how Trump is going to come after even privileged people. If he dismantles the Department of Education, there goes your right to free K-12 education for your children, your daycare subsidies. Imagine the decimation of Head Start. You think higher ed is expensive now? Wait until there is no federal financial aid. You’re a white woman with abdominal pain? Good luck finding a doctor who is trained in diagnosing your illness and isn’t scared to treat it. It might not happen now. It might not happen tomorrow. But it’s going to happen.
And that doesn’t even begin to touch what is going to happen to our most vulnerable friends. I can’t even think about it. The selfishness of people on both side right now. The “it’ll be fine” people are almost as irritating to me as the MAGA people. Great, I’m happy you *think* it won’t impact you. But there are people right now who are terrified. And that’s who we should ALL be thinking about.
I know. It is a bit optimistic to say we won’t be affected. And, even if we aren’t don’t we care about others? I’m going to email you again.
I guess it’s a small thing, but your photos of those pride stickers in the mall cheered me up a bit. I guess we could say it’s rainbow capitalism and pink-washing, but I think it’s a reminder that we’ve come a long way and people are not gonna go back…
(I hope!)
We have come a long way. My manager at work, who’s gay, reminded me how far we’ve come. Slow and steady progress is what we can hope for.
Your son is so smart, Jenny <3 and I'm so glad you were able to do things to support yourself and where you were at. I feel like yesterday happened around me – I went through the motions with work and Lil Momma's dance and homework but my head and my heart were so weighed down and caught up. To Engie's point, I'm trying to think about how I can support those who will be severely impacted by this and use what privilege I have for good and change.
I agree- I feel like I’m still going through the motions to some extent. My son is smart- but he also lacks a certain perspective. Or, maybe his perspective is the correct one? I don’t know.
Your son’s perspective which I remind myself of often, eases my anxiety but not my sadness over the outcome.
I agree- I’ll never stop being sad that so many people chose Trump this time.
I am very sad for my American friends, however they voted, for the way the country will go for four years with people feeling empowered to express unpleasant opinions (we have very much had that post-Brexit). I thought the Conservatives would never go and in the end they did; I suspected we wouldn’t beat the dreadful man who was standing for MP in our constituency (look up Anderton Park School protests if you don’t mind upsetting yourself) but we did. And those pride stickers remind us there are good people around. Much love to you.
Thank you Liz! I agree- it goes in cycles. We might be in for a dark time, but we’ll come out of it… eventually.
I am so disappointed, confused and a bit nervous for the next 4 years.
I can’t believe how the popular vote went! It’s very disturbing to me.
Also, I saw 15M less Dem voters this cycle but don’t have the source.
I don’t understand how people voted party over country; veterans voted for him; people ignoring Jan 6th. Just the way he talks about people should have citizens not vote for him.
I know. Is “the economy” really more important that basic human decency? It’s sad that so may people think it is.
your son is very wise! In other countries, mostly developing countries, the institutions are so weak that whatever the president wants, happens. In the US there’s accountability, check and balance so I’m hopeful that while it’s not good, it is not as bad as it happened in the two countries I lived and witnessed two elections similar to the US case. Hang in there! get your comfort and retail therapy to go through this grief process.
There are checks and balances, it’s true. We’ll see what happens. Thank you, Coco!
The thing I can’t stop worrying about is… Will we have another chance in 4 years? He wants to be a dictator. He even said, “Vote for me now and you’ll never have to vote again.” There are no checks and balances now. He rules the Supreme Court (and will be able to put at least 2, maybe 3, more judges there). He is going to fill his cabinet with yes men who will just do what he wants. He wants to imprison anyone who thinks differently than him or dares to criticize him. Women are going to die, doctors are going to be jailed for DOING THEIR JOB, and our rights are going to be stripped away. It doesn’t matter if you’re privileged or not – this is going to affect ALL of us in some way.
The only thing I can take solace in is that my county went blue – and more blue in 2024 than 2020 – so at least I’m safe as a queer person. For now.
I know. “We’ll vote again in four years may not work this time.”
Honestly, I haven’t even checked to see how my county voted. We used to be blue, but we’ve gotten more and more red. I mean, he LIVES in our stupid county for god’s sake. It sucks.
Still in shock.
How did happen?
Good news. He’s can’t run again.
Yes and even if he implements his plan to be dictator, let’s face it… how much longer is he really going to live? He’s not looking good these days.
I appreciate your like-mindedness! My biggest worry about the next 4 years will be how his decision to make RFK jr as health czar will affect my job–especially his anti-vax stance. I already have a lot of reluctant vaccinators and my employer lets us discharge non-vaccinators from our practice. But what will happen when mandatory childhood vaccines go away? I’m scared. It’s hard to believe that the US is going to be run by a ship of fools.
Ugh. I cried all day.