There were so many things about this wedding that were out of my comfort zone- one of them was dancing. It’s funny, because our family is so musical- but somehow the music didn’t transfer into our bodies. When Paul told me we were going to have a “first dance” together, I knew we were in trouble.
On the Wednesday before the wedding, I was staying with my sister. Isabel was having her bachelorette party, so Paul asked if he could stay at my sister’s with me that night.
YES HE COULD!!! I was thrilled to have one last night with him. My sister lives about an hour away from Valparaiso, so we had a nice talk on the drive, then a nice dinner with my sister and brother-in-law. AND THEN… I grimly told Paul that we had to practice our dance.
We put on “Hello Goodbye” (the Beatles song, which Paul had chosen) and tried to make our way through it. When we finished Paul exclaimed “That was HORRIBLE” and I collapsed into laughter. As Paul explained it, “I’ve never danced with someone equally as bad as I am- I’ve always had someone better to lead the way.” Obviously we had some work to do.
Thank goodness we had my brother-in-law to help. He’s the type of person who’s up for anything- whether it’s singing, dancing, cooking, painting a sign, repairing a fence… he’s willing to do it all. He gave us some pointers- “you guys are stepping to far too the side, don’t pump your arms like that…” and we tried again. This time we were much better. But, we realized it would be super boring to do the same thing over and over again for the whole song, so we added in some rudimentary “choreography.”
Since we’re not skilled enough to do things like spins and dips, we practiced some silly things like…as the song started: “You say yes, I say no…” we swayed slowly back and forth… “I say stop, and you say go, go GO” on the third “go” we started dancing enthusiastically and animatedly. “You say high, I say low…” we put our arms up high, then low… you get the idea.
It’s pretty hard to “dance like no one’s watching” when in fact, there are 130 people watching you, but we did pretty well. We could hear people laughing at our attempts at choreography. Who knows what we actually looked like, but we enjoyed it.
Afterwards I realized that the other first dances- Isabel and Paul, and Isabel with her father- were slow and sentimental, while ours was more… jaunty. I can imagine people thinking “oh, they must have done that because that’s how they danced together when Paul was little.” No, that’s actually how we dance now, ha ha.
I had so much fun that I danced even more during the reception. Here’s another photo, which I love because my daughter is looking at me and laughing- possibly because she’s having fun or perhaps she thinks I look stupid (unfortunately, as usual I have to blur her face out!)
This was one of the many things about the wedding experience where I thought I couldn’t do something, but then realized that in fact, YES I CAN!
Do you like to dance? Are you good at it?
Top photo by Sandy Millar on Unsplash
25 Responses
You danced and had fun! Excellent! Great song, BTW. The dress was a great choice of dress for dancing – looks so pretty and flowing.
I can’t dance; I have no rhythm. Anything you did would look like ballroom dancing compared to my lack of grace.
Ha ha… I’m pretty sure we didn’t look like ballroom dancers. But we did have rhythm, so there’s that at least.
Good on you Jenny! I feel like with dancing the hardest thing is start and then you just get into the fun of it all. But yes, you need to scrren out any thoughts of people watching. You look amazing BTW.
At my son’s wedding they only had the bride and groom dance and then everyone could join them on the dance floor. I love to dance but hardly get any opportunities so I made the most of it. Once we were on the dance floor I didn’t leave until the end of the night. G did one dance with me then slunk off for the rest of the night. HAHA! I danced with friends, my neices and nephews and my brother in law who is so enthusiastic he nearly rips your arm out when he’s spinning you which is why my sister refuses to dance.
Thank you so much Melissa!!! I can’t say that I “love” to dance now, but I enjoyed it so much more than I thought I would. I’m kind of bummed that I don’t when the next opportunity will come up.
I’m so uncomfortable at dancing!! I will do anything to get out of it.
You give me hope that with a bit of preparation, I could still do it!
You did so well, Jenny! You both look relaxed and happy on that photo – I guess that is the most important thing when dancing. I can’t wait to see what the professional photos look like, too!
Trust me, Catrina- if I did it, you could too. Preparation is definitely crucial though!
YES YOU CAN!!! YES YOU DID!
I love dancing and I will dance at any opportunity I have. I groove even in the kitchen when I’m making dinner. A few weeks ago we went to a little concert and I didn’t leave the dance floor once. I don’t know if I’m “good at it,” I just have fun with it. If people are watching, oh well, let them watch. It’s more fun to dance than to watch!
I think your first dance sounds great! Why not make it fun, I say!
Ha, it would be funny if I started dancing all the time now. I can picture myself dancing around the kitchen and my family thinking I’ve lost my mind. But hey- life is short! I’ll dance if I want to.
I LOVE THESE PICTURES
Thank you Sarah!!!
I grew up in dance classes so I do enjoy dancing but I don’t know if I’m good at it. I actually didn’t get to dance much at my sister’s wedding because I had to go back to the Airbnb to take care of my dog because she had been alone for 6+ hours but I’m sure the dance floor was fun that night!
Haha about Elaine’s dancing! I just saw a video about an Elaine dancing contest — maybe you could take part! The contestants all dressed up like Elaine and it was super funny to watch.
Oh, that is hilarious- I’m going to look that up. And, if you enjoy dancing you’re probably pretty good at it. But what do I know??!
This is so fun, Jenny. I want to see videos!!!
I have never really danced… ever. It wasn’t a thing approved by my parents (very conservative Baptists) and while I love music I just do NOT have any natural rhythm. I danced a few times in college at the local pub but it was not really dancing. Just… moving a bit to music.
I love watching dancing, but have zero desire to learn how to dance.
Elisabeth, I also had fun watching the “youngsters” dance. There was one song… I think it was called “Church Clap” (???) and all the teenagers knew some fun choreography to it. So their church is definitely less conservative than yours was!
Eep! I cannot dance and I don’t enjoy trying. However, when we’re at weddings somehow it seems to happen.
What I see in the photos is two people having an epic time! That will only come across more clearly in the professional photos.
We’ll just see about that when we get those photos! It should be pretty funny.
I mean, I’m not GOOD at it, but I love to dance. I LOVE a wedding reception because what other time can an adult just bust a move?
You look like you were having so much fun! I am glad it was an amazing day for everybody.
I agree, Engie- a wedding reception is one of the few times an adult gets to dance. I mean, when else will it happen? I’m not going out to clubs (that would be.. not good). Now I’m hoping I get invited to more weddings.
I’m a passable dancer and it helps to have a little buzz going if possible. I did not practice dancing with my dad for my wedding. But we kept it very basic and Phil danced with his mom at the same time to reduce some of the pressure on both of us. And they only played the song for something like 2 minutes? We danced to ‘The Way You Look Tonight’. Phil and I danced to ‘Here, There and Everywhere’. He laughs at the ‘changing my life with the wave of her hand’ because I am the schedule boss. Lol. We actually did not have a dance at our wedding, though. Neither of us felt strongly about dancing and we wanted time to talk with our guests. So we still had those ‘special dances’ during the reception but then there was just background music. At my last several family weddings a lot of the guests would be outside the reception hall talking as we don’t all see each other very often so we wanted to talk, not dance and shout to hear each other. But I also got married at 36 so was a sort of old bride and didn’t want a big dance party. And that meant the wedding ended around 9-10 versus going until midnight. But it matched our personalities.
Yes, I would say one thing- for all three of the “first dances” I think they should have cut it off after a couple minutes. It felt like they all went on a little too long. The feel of this wedding was definitely “dance” and as a matter of fact, the DJ announced that Paul and Isabel really wanted everyone to dance at their wedding. I have the strange feeling that vibe came from Isabel’s family- I’m not sure Paul felt passionate about dancing, He did have fun though! I have a video of him in a conga line with the groomsmen, ha ha.
I love these pictures, and I’m glad Paul picked a peppy song! When my husband and I got married, we went to a free introductory dance lesson, where we were advised to pick a fun song rather than something slow, since we didn’t really know how to waltz or anything like that. It was good advice, and we had a great first dance. Our song was ‘We are in love’ by Harry Connick Jr.
I love to dance, though the opportunities are not what they once were. We used to love going every Thursday night when we were in college, there was a club that was free or cheap with your student ID. SO FUN.
Yes, Engie made a similar comment. Other than a wedding reception, when does an adult really get to dance nowadays? And, yes, that’s true- if we had picked a slow song, we would have just been swaying back and forth the entire time, since we don’t know any actual, legitimate dance moves.
I am not a good dancer but I used to enjoy it though. With girl friends. It’s been a while (other than my stepson’s wedding) that I’ve danced.
Yes, several other people have made that comment- a wedding reception is pretty much the only place a “mature adult” gets to dance nowadays. I guess we need to go to more weddings!
Dancing can be really fun, especially when you just don’t think about how BAD you are (*cough* me *cough*). I love dancing at weddings – it’s always so fun!
That’s such a sweet story of you and Paul learning your dance together. <3