The Wedding Part 1- Tears

Thanks for all the very kind comments on yesterday’s post! You know how long-winded I can be when I do a race recap, so get ready for all the details! I’m breaking it up into parts so I don’t have a 5000 word post.

A while back, a blogger (I think it was Elisabeth?) talked about having a good, cathartic cry, and I realized- I don’t really cry when I’m sad. Or, I don’t like to. It doesn’t help me, just leaves me feeling more sad and depleted. But I’m a HUGE crybaby when it comes to events like weddings and graduations. So I was worried I would cry way too much at this wedding. I know tears are expected at weddings, but I didn’t want to sob uncontrollably from start to finish. Leading up to the day, every time I even thought about the wedding my eyes would well up with tears, and I came up with a trick. Every time I started to get emotional, I would think “algebra, algebra!” and it somehow calmed me down.

I know it sounds weird, but it WORKS. A couple days before the wedding I was telling my sister and BIL about this trick, and my BIL called it my “weeping safe word.” I encourage everyone to try it! Your weeping safe word doesn’t have to be algebra (obviously) but any neutral or silly word that works for you.

Day of the wedding! The way they did the processional was- first, groom and mom. Then, bride’s dad escorted her mom, then bridesmaids etc. So Paul and I were leading the processional. Gulp!

At the church, the groomsmen waited in one room, while Isabel, the bridesmaids and the moms waited in another. All week, Isabel had been incredibly composed- unlike me, she is not a cryer. The girls put the finishing touches on their hair and makeup and with about five minutes to go, we noticed Isabel had a funny look on her face. Her mom said “Are you okay?” and Isabel burst into tears. It was astonishing, and also incredibly touching. Her mom swooped over to her, and I remembered that for all of their maturity, Paul and Isabel are still so young. They’re not even finished with college! At that moment, someone came in and said “Paul is looking for his mom. I think he’s nervous.” (They still need us!)

I went out to stand with Paul, We talked through our part of the processional (walk in, not too fast, stop, hug, Paul steps back so I can sit, Paul moves up to the front). Then it was time to line up.

Waiting to start, I wasn’t scared or overly emotional.  I was a little nervous, but mostly excited and PROUD. I was proud of Paul and proud to be walking in with him on his wedding day. I was doing great! AND THEN…

Paul turned to me and said “I wish Grandma and Grandpa were here.” PAUL. Why would you say that right now??? I totally lost it. We were less than a minute away from starting and tears were running down my face and my nose was running. Paul had been apprised of my weeping safe word and said “Algebra! Algebra! Geometry! Trigonometry! CALCULUS!!!” We both started to laugh, and I was able to compose myself and wipe away the tears (and snot) just as they motioned us forward to begin.

I made it through the processional just fine, and then… well, everyone cries during the ceremony. That’s why they place a box of tissues on each pew! Someone captured a photo of Paul and Isabel in the recessional…

And here is one of the worst photos ever taken of our family. Unfortunately I have to blur out my daughter’s face (at her insistence) but just imagine someone with dark, dramatic eye makeup, giving me the angry side eye. It is HILARIOUS.

I can’t decide if I’m excited or scared to see the professional photos.

Link Up With Tuesday Topics

Welcome back to Tuesday Topics, as Jenny, from Runners Fly joins Jenn at Runs With Pugs to co-host this link-up! Please join us every week for a new topic! Write on our weekly prompt or choose your own topic! Make sure to add your post to the link up, link back to your hosts, and comment on the other shared posts!

Do you have any tricks you use to keep yourself from crying?

Top photo by Ed Leszczynskl on Unsplash